


If I Were A Boy

by Thewriterinme



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, F/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-04 00:07:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1074659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thewriterinme/pseuds/Thewriterinme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gender!Swap Quinn. She realizes that "Be careful what you wish for, cause you just might get it," is more true than what we think. Faberry. Rated T for now...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

If I Were A Boy, Part I

Hour: -16

Sometimes Quinn would be walking down the hallway to class and not even be thinking about Rachel and Finn when she'd spot them talking next to a locker. Finn would usually be towering over Rachel with a scowl on his face, and angry words spewing out of his mouth. Once, she heard him say that she was annoying; another time, Rachel was selfish; and more than once, he told Rachel he didn't listen to much she said.

That one infuriated Quinn the most. Why did Rachel Berry stay with this ridiculous asshole who made her feel like shit?

Well, it's not like she could even argue treating Rachel any better. Their history only serves to prove that she is just as awful as Finn. Slushies, mean words, pornographic pictures of Rachel on the bathroom wall. Humiliating Rachel and bullying her every chance she got. There's no excuse.

Quinn snapped out of her mind when she saw Rachel briefly break eye contact with Finn and stare at her. Across the hallway, it was if a camera zoomed out in a high speed effect, from Rachel's dark eyes all the way to Quinn's bright ones. And just as quickly the eye contact was made, it was torn apart by Rachel who simply smiled sadly at Finn, as if giving up, and walked away.

Before she could stop herself, Quinn was standing in front of the sullen boy, demanding to know what was wrong with him, "what is your problem? Why are you always such a jerk?" She didn't really know what he had said to Rachel, but the way Rachel had walked away with downcast eyes told her he must've hurt her again.

"What- back off, Quinn. This is none of your business."

"Uh," she rolled her eyes and pushed her fingers into his shoulder hard, "yes, it is." She stressed each word and made sure not to break from his gaze.

He, as big and as menacing he should be able to look, shifted his weight nervously and asked, "why? What's in it to you?"

"Nothing," she was quick to answer, because the last thing she needed was Finn Hudson outing her too. But she just couldn't deal with his immature way of treating Rachel. Especially now that she had finally admitted to herself that she liked her.

And Rachel chose to be with Finn; to be engaged to Finn. Daily, Rachel chose to be okay with the way Finn treated her. Even with Quinn giving every hint - overt and discreetly - to Rachel that she wants her.

If she were a boy, Quinn would be a better everything. She would listen to her, she would be a better man... than Finn. And than herself. She would be a better man than she is as a woman to Rachel. Because she wouldn't have to hide how she feels behind empty threats and slushie facials. She would be able to go after Rachel in any way she wanted to and it'd be okay. One, because Rachel is straight, and two, because she wouldn't have to be afraid.

Hour: -12

Glee club was always the same. Someone went up there and sang a heartfelt solo about their undying love for someone else and then cried. That someone being Rachel Berry always. This time was not different.

Rachel stood in the middle of the room, staring at each of her friends with what seemed to be a practiced patience. When she felt like it was time, she took a deep breath and began to sing about being completely in love with Finn Hudson. Whom, again, looked constipated and annoyed by Rachel's performance. If Quinn had been the one being serenaded by Rachel with a song by Taylor Swift the way Finn - of all people Finn! - was, she would die happily. But no, that's not her life because she's a girl and afraid, and she doesn't have Rachel.

Oh, what she would do to be a guy. At least for a day. Maybe a week. Enough time to spend it with Rachel without being afraid of the consequences; being completely honest; being the better version of herself.

Hour: -12.5

Half an hour later and Quinn was raising her hand. She had this song on her back pocket for a while now, she's just been terri-fucking-fied of singing it, for obvious reasons. The implications that come with it are too grandiose for her own good.

Would they listen to what she has to say and judge her? Would they think she's in a relationship with a guy who could care less? Or could someone, anyone smart enough, possibly finally figure out what she's been hiding all this time?

She's had her eye out for Kurt, Blaine, Santana, and Britt, because these four have the most honed gaydars out of everyone. Even Rachel with her gay dads clearly has horrible gaydar.

Pushing through her fears, Quinn chose to just go for it for once. She decided to risk it. Better just let this one thing out and feel free of its chains, than keep it in forever and just let it rot her heart away. The beginning of the song came out timid and vulnerable. She searched for strength in nervously switching her weight from left to right and right to left. Eventually, the nerves gave way to the power behind the meaning of the song and Quinn was able to finish it strong.

If I were a boy  
I think I could understand  
How it feels to love a girl  
I swear I'd be a better man

I'd listen to her  
'Cause I know how it hurts  
When you lose the one you wanted  
'Cause he's taking you for granted  
And everything you had got destroyed

It's a little too late for you to come back  
Say it's just a mistake  
Think I'd forgive you like that  
If you thought I would wait for you  
You thought wrong

But you're just a boy  
You don't understand  
And you don't understand, oh  
How it feels to love a girl  
Someday you wish you were a better man

You don't listen to her  
You don't care how it hurts  
Until you lose the one you wanted  
'Cause you're taking her for granted  
And everything you had got destroyed  
But you're just a boy

Quinn hoped (but not really) that she didn't sound so spiteful at boys toward the end there. But, apparently she killed the song because everyone was applauding her. Finn himself was clapping and smiling at her like a dork. She wanted him to vanish - the song was about - well, no. It was about and to him; and about and to Rachel; and about and to herself.

Out of the corner of her eye, Quinn caught Rachel trying to push through the pain of something Finn so obviously did (like not giving any second thought or care about her performance to him), to be supportive of Quinn. She was smiling with her mouth, but Quinn knew Rachel Berry. She knew her like the lion stalks his prey. And she could see it in her eyes that Rachel was anything but all smiles on the inside. She was sad, torn, and devastated by this one boy. A boy who was treating Rachel the way Quinn treated him. And that's just not fair, because Finn is a moron, but Rachel is so much better than that.

She sat down and looked around her, quietly receiving the praises and friendly gestures from her friends around her. Once more, she paid specific attention to Santana and Britt, Kurt and Blaine, just to be sure.

Quinn should've been watching out for someone else. Someone smart enough. Because as she sang the lyrics to the song that had been haunting her day and night for the past month, she missed a smile quirk on the lips of a fellow glee-clubber. Someone smart enough to know what she was saying; to hear what she so desperately wished for.

Someone willing to grant her that wish.

Hour: -11, immediately after Glee club meeting

"What's wrong?" She asked when she noticed that the crying was coming from a stall. The sniffling was bothering her, but she saw the shoes under the door and she immediately knew who it was. When she allowed herself to speak to Rachel, she usually went straight to the point.

A timid voice, brimming with tears, asked, "Quinn?"

"Yeah, Rachel. It's me, now open the door and come out here. Let's... talk." It was always a struggle to talk about feelings with Rachel Berry without giving herself away, which is why she either completely avoided the girl or went out of her way to be a bitch. But she was getting tired of seeing Rachel suffer all the time because of Finn, and she really just decided to stop trying convincing the girl otherwise ever since she had that conversation in this same bathroom a few weeks ago telling her not to get married to Finn that Rachel completely decided to ignore.

The door creaked open and from behind it, a puffy-eyed Rachel Berry emerged, smoothing her white skirt and then rubbing the palm of her hands under her eyes. She stalked over to stand in front of the mirror and said, "nothing's wrong, Quinn."

"Oh, my god, Rachel. You did not just try that with me when I can see you're crying." Quinn turned to face Rachel's back in one swift motion and crossed her arms over her chest. The dress she had on flew with the wind caused by the motion.

Rachel stopped trying to fix her running makeup and looked at Quinn's eyes. Quinn felt dizzy and moved to use the sink next to Rachel's for support.

"Wait, are you okay?" Rachel asked and put a hand on Quinn's elbow to steady her when she saw the girl falter a step. "You seem a little pale, and your eyes-" Rachel stopped herself from continuing her sentence, and that only made Quinn wonder why. She looked at her eyes in the mirror and found they were a different color. The green was not solid - it was as if someone took a paintbrush to the iris. On a regular day, even without the sun shining on her eyes, they were much brighter than this - much lighter. The fact that Rachel noticed it, though, means that Rachel knows the exact color of her eyes.

"I'm fine, Rachel," she diverted the subject back to the brunette. "What's up?"

Rachel dropped her hand from Quinn's arm, making her miss the feeling already. "It's Finn, obviously. He's being a jerk because of our engagement and now he's talking about California or something. He called me selfish, and I just - I'm so tired of fighting for someone who doesn't care to fight back. I mean, you saw how I sang for him in there - about how our love can survive whatever test life throws at us, and he just - doesn't care. He never tries anymore. I don't even know why he'd want to marry me if he's going to be like this."

Quinn shook her unruly, blonde hair, and stepped closer, opening her arms, "Rachel, Finn's an asshole." Of course he is, if he makes a girl like Rachel suffer so much. She felt Rachel try to pull away, but then she said, "but he'll realize what he's doing and he'll be better." Because it's what Rachel wanted to hear.

Hour: -7

Getting through her homework was not easy. She felt like fainting more than twelve times (she started to count after the third). Her appetite suddenly grew at around 6 P.M. but she burrowed her head in her books and continued studying. Being so close to finals week meant dealing with hunger and the need to die later - like say, during summer time.

Quinn was nothing but if not disciplined. When she told herself she was going to study for four hours in preparation for her Monday exam, she truly stuck to it. But now, four hours later, she was feeling terribly exhausted, and in dire need of a burger with extra bacon; a nice, long, steaming hot shower; and her bed. Eight was not too early to go to bed on a Friday night was it? Does that make her uncool or whatever? Well, who cares? Ever since her baby-gate scandal, and then the Skanks phase when she got that awful tattoo (but she's already had that removed after ten weeks at a dermatologist specialized in tattoo removal), Quinn didn't worry as much about being top of the school. She was content in having a family in her mother and sister, good friends in Santana and Brittany (and even Rachel when she wasn't being annoying with the Finn thing), and the rest of the Glee club as a support system.

So she followed her plan of action. She drove to the nearest Wendy's and got the Baconator with large fries and a large Fanta, plus their chicken nuggets, and a chili - and holy crap, when did she start to eat so much? Well, last time she was eating like this - never mind. That would have been impossible since she hadn't had sex since then.

After food and shower, Quinn dropped in bed. She was not expecting the surprise she'd get first thing in the morning.

Hour: 1

At five in the a.m., Quinn woke up with a jolt. She cried in pain and felt like she was drowning for what she thought was an hour (but was really a mere ten seconds). That need to faint came again, even when she was lying down, and she decided that the best she could do for herself was to not get up. So she didn't. She lied there and convinced herself it was nothing, that she was fine, that everything was okay.

She went back to sleep.

Hour: 5

Thirteen hours had passed since she first went to bed. Thirteen hours she slept. She felt more tired than the day before but she got up anyway because Frannie was coming into town, and Frannie being in town meant she could spend all day shopping with her sister and not worrying about that barbecue slash-'Let'sGetPumpedForFinalsWeek' party Rachel was throwing at her house later in the afternoon. With summer being around the corner, it promised to be pool weather and that only meant one thing: being around a semi-naked, wet Rachel.

Knowing her sister, she'd probably make her go anyway. Her sister was the only one who knew of her little girl crush so far (and how much she hated herself for it).

Frannie was born and raised in Lima, OH, but she got away as fast as she could, moving to Los Angeles, a place where sexuality doesn't give a fuck. Frannie herself was straight, with a boyfriend - Kyle, really nice dude, - but all she cared for was having her little sister be happy.

It was strange, sitting up and getting up. Her legs felt like lead, and they itched too. Like she hadn't shaved in days. Much like her face, actually.

Groaning, and not without work, she made it to the hallway, where she walked straight into her tall, slender, and beautiful older sister.

"Ouch!" She yelled, bringing her foot up. She clutched it in her hands because Frannie stepped on it and she stepped on it hard. She barely noticed how hairy her legs were when Frannie yelled.

"Ah! Who the fuck are you?" She squinted her eyes at Quinn. Quinn raised an eyebrow at this. Who the fuc- who was she? She was Quinn, why! Was Frannie high? That had to be it. She did look concerned and astonished, a little fearful, too, with her eyes bulging out like that.

"Frannie, what are you talking about? It's me. Quinn!"

Frannie almost laughed out loud at the outrageous lie. "You're not my -" Then she stopped and really paid attention. Slowly, understanding, her eyes started to grow. Then her mouth shaped an 'o' and she gasped. "Holy hell, you are Quinn." Quinn watched as recognition made its presence known again on her sister's features and stepped in to hug her. The hug was a little stiff because she felt sore - her muscles were achy - and because her sister was a bit awkward still.

"Of course it's me. Who'd you think it'd be?" Something between her legs felt uncomfortable. She looked down at the middle of her legs. Her sweats were significantly higher right there. "What the fuck." She exclaimed and then looked at Fannie with a horrified look. "Frannie! Frannie -" her tone of voice increased in pitch rapidly, making her fears known. "What's this? What's that? Why is - why?"

Looking almost apologetic for her, Frannie exhaled deeply. "Quinn, you have to go look at yourself in the mirror." She took her by the hand, and Quinn wobbled to the bathroom, with that tent pitched on her sweats. She knew what that meant, she wasn't dumb, but that was impossible. That sort of stuff was unrealistic and it just didn't happen. When in front of the mirror, Frannie kind of giggled and made Quinn look at her own reflection.

A boy was staring right back at her.

"You've got morning wood, cause you're a dude."

Hour: 5, still in the bathroom

When the feelings to her legs had returned, Quinn pushed herself back up and looked again. Carefully and slowly, she inched her face closer and closer to the mirror until her nose was touching the glass. She closed her eyes and opened them back up. It was a darker green than it had been in the bathroom but they were definitely her eyes. And her nose was her nose. And her mouth - they all just happened to be... slightly manlier. Okay, not slightly. Completely. She looked like a dude.

"Fucking shit, what the fuck?" Coherent sentence, Quinn. She ran a hand, a larger hand, through her shorter blonde hair. At least she was a clean-cut guy.

Frannie, whom she even forgot was in the room behind her, said, "are you okay?"

"Do I look okay, Fran?! I look like a boy!" She whined.

Her sister cracked a smile, and then stifled a laugh when Quinn demanded to know why she was laughing. She tried insisting on 'nothing,' but Quinn's perseverance won. "It's just that... You already have a boy's name, and now you look like one!" She burst out laughing and then steered herself. "I'm just kidding, sis. So - you don't know what happened?"

"No," Quinn gritted out through her teeth, not even slightly amused by Frannie's joke. "I have no idea. I went to bed as Quinn and... Woke up like this."

"Well, well, well. How do we even beging explaining this to anyone?" Frannie wondered out loud. She thought about something for a second, staring hard at Quinn's new body and then asked, "do you have any idea of why this would happen? And why to you?" She sat on the edge of the bathtub and gestured for Quinn to take a seat next to her.

After a few moments considering the questions, Quinn answered, "I think it's the universe's way of giving me a chance; a second chance, if you will."

Frannie liked the thought of that and hummed approvingly. "Sweet, a second chance. But why? Or, rather, a second chance for what?"

Quinn took a deep breath, feeling dizzy at the way the air filled up her lungs, "A second chance with Rachel Berry. To be who she deserves me to be."

"Rachel! This is that girl you're madly in love with, right?" Frannie asked, knowing the answer very well. "I think that this is a great opportunity then. And that you shouldn't freak out and waste it, even if it's a little - odd." The way she smiled took Quinn back to when she had just come out to her sister as being into a girl. Frannie had smiled then, with teary eyes, and pulled her in for a hug, telling her how much she loved her and how proud she was. "Don't mess it up this time, sis." She told her and winked. "Or, should I call you bro?"

Standing up, Quinn chuckled, really taking in what her - well, his sister was telling him. He shifted his weight in front of the mirror and dragged his eyes from Frannie's bright green eyes to the mirror. "Yeah, you're right." He took a deep breath and pulled on the hem of the cotton shirt he was wearing. "I can't waste this opportunity."

"Good attitude. How about you take a shower, because you already totally stink," Frannie started with a face, "I mean, goodness, you've only been a boy for like, five hours?" Shaking her head, she went back to the point, "right, so, shower, and then come to my room. I think I've got just the outfits for your new body." With a sly smile, Frannie left the bathroom.

Quinn shut the door and started to undress himself, slowly peeling off each article of clothing until he was staring at his entire body. Wow, he had a big - gulp - a big... thingy. Down there. He averted his eyes, awkward with himself. He thought about touching it, but felt wrong about it, so he just jumped in the shower and proceeded to wash his body. (He cleaned his new man parts without looking or thinking too hard about it.)


	2. Chapter 2

If I Were a Boy, Part II

Hour: 6

Quinn was standing, with a towel wrapped over his chest, staring at the outfit Frannie had picked for him.

"Those should fit you perfectly. I mean, they are girl's pants, but no one will be able to notice the difference." Frannie was sitting on her old childhood bed, with a laptop on her lap, googling 'random sex change.' Nothing on the subject was ever random though. There were websites on intersexed people, and transsexuals and transgenders - but nothing about people going to sleep as a girl and waking up as a boy. "And, seriously, bro? You wrap the towel around your waist, not non-existent boobs. Not that you ever had much of those before..." she dodged the slap Quinn tried to hit her with, laughing. She caught a glimpse of that tattoo Quinn had gotten once (no, not that awful Ryan Seacrest one. Thank you, God, she already got rid of it!) and cried to her about it over the phone all night long. She still didn't know what it said or what it meant but it had been a great cause for distress.

"Whatever," Quinn mumbled but wrapped the towel as his sister had told him to anyway. "Fran," he sat at the edge of the bed, next to Frannie and tried to get a glimpse on the information his sister was gathering. Frannie immediately looked to him with a sympathetic expression and then sighed. She lifted the laptop from her lap and scooted it down the bed. Quinn laid his head on Frannie's lap, like he used to do when they were growing up. Then, she would whine or cry or talk to Fran about how much she hated their parents or someone at school had picked on her size. Now, he wanted to curl into a fetus and disappear. So, not that big a difference.

Frannie ran her fingers over his wet hair, calming him down. He's always liked that. His eyes were closed, his breath relaxing. He could feel Frannie's eyes washing over his face, and he cried. It was quiet and fast. He cried and when the tears ran out, he stood, said nothing, and grabbed the outfit from the bed.

Hour 6.5:

"Do you really think this is a good idea? What am I even going to tell her? Who am I? Why am I even there?" Quinn looked at himself on his sister's mirror, dressed in clothes he would never have bought for himself. He tugged on the collar of the plaid shirt he was wearing, under the brown vest covering his back and open at the front. His jeans were ripped, not entirely tight, but they rubbed uncomfortably against his package. He was wearing boxers, or whatever, but it still was a weird feeling to get used to. It just felt so heavy, dangling there. He fixed it and groaned at himself for doing what he's always hated in other guys.

Frannie surveyed her work from the doorway, holding up a sandwich, "eat. You must be starving." The grin on her face told Quinn that no matter what, Frannie loved him. As if she already didn't know that.

His sister was right, as she always was. He was starving, so with one last look at himself on the full mirror, he turned and raised an eyebrow at her. "So?" Opening his arms wide, he did a 180 once and reached for the sandwich. "How do I look?"

"Hot," Frannie told him, and buttoned his vest. "I'll go grab those brown shoes dad has but never wears. You'll be the handsomest guy at the party. She'll not even wonder what you're doing there, because she'll be drooling all over you."

He shook his hair, strawberry blonde and not yet combed back. It was sticking in every direction from when he towel-dried his hair after the shower. "How do I even begin t-"

"A second chance, Q." Frannie told him seriously. He bit his bottom lip but ran a thumb over it when he realized most guys she's met never did that.

"Fine," he sighed, and ran fingers to comb his hair back. "Do you have like, gel or something? Or do I just let it dry? Do I blow dry it?"

Frannie took his free hand and led him to the bathroom. "Let's just fix it like it was when I saw you this morning." Quinn leaned against the counter, standing three inches taller than Frannie now (instead of Frannie being an inch taller), and proceeded to finish the sandwich in two bites. He was famished. Frannie grabbed his rough chin, tilted it down a little and combed his hair to the side. The ends of his hair were primped up, and when he turned to look at himself on the mirror, he smiled. Itching the hair growing on his jawline, he asked Frannie, "Fran, do you think I should shave?"

"Nah," Frannie told him and slapped his arm toward the bedroom, "Girls like facial hair." With a wink, Fran sat back on the bed and then asked, "have you thought about a name yet?"

Hour 7:

"James?"

"No."

"Karl?"

"C or K?"

"K...?"

"No."

"You don't like any of my ideas! We've been at this for thirty minutes!"

"You have terrible ideas."

"I don't have to help you know that, right?"

"Just keep saying them," he pleaded, laying on his back, an arm thrown over his face.

"Octavius."

"You must be fucking joking."

"Richard?"

"Too old."

"Preston, George, Ezra - like Mr. Fitz."

"Next, next, and next."

"Alejandro, Lucas, We-"

"Wait! I like that one," Quinn sat up and smiled at Frannie, excited about his new name.

Frannie looked disgusted even if she suggested it, "Alejandro? Bro, that was a joke."

"No! The one after that. Lucas. Luke. Like, it's close to Lucy."

Frannie grinned at him and said, "Luke. I can see it. It fits you, baby brother."

Quinn narrowed his eyes at Frannie and warned, "you'll really have to stop calling me that."

"What? I'm trying to practice, just in case someone asks!"

"I can't be your brother then! How the hell would our parents explain that! I have to be like... a friend or a cousin, or- or like, a colleague. I don't know."

Frannie stood, her blonde hair shining against the sunlight coming through the window. "You should be a cousin. You look too much like a Fabray not to be one."

"I am a Fabray," Quinn stated, crossing her arms.

"Stand with your legs further apart," Frannie instructed, never moving from her spot. "Yeah, technically you are, but other people don't know that. If you show up and introduce yourself as something other than Fabray it'll just seem suspicious."

"Alright, Luke Fabray. Our father's second cousin removed son."

Frannie laughed out loud, holding her belly, "you better remember that every time someone asks."

"I will," Luke promised. "Now, onto more pressing matters - how do we explain this to the parents?" His sister gave him a wicked smile which kind of scared him. He threw his hands up, "I don't even know if I want to know."

"Just leave it to me."

Hour: 8

"This still feels kind of lame, showing up to a party no one knows who I am."

"You ever hear of crashing a party?"

"Why would I want to crash a party with a bunch of losers?" Luke asked. "Nobody at school cares about Glee club. If I'm the only person who wasn't invited to show up... that'll look weird."

Luke cast his eyes toward Rachel's house once again. It was one story, with white windows, and a small garden at the front. To the side, there was a fence which led to the backyard where Luke could hear party music coming from.

Frannie just pushed at his biceps, and he took the hint. He opened the car door and stepped out, feeling the warm air. It was a pool party, yes, but he was taking no chances here. He didn't bring any swimming shorts, afraid of what could happen when he was only wearing them.

Turning around to ask Frannie if he could please go home, he saw Frannie wave and drive off.

"Fuck."

"Um, hi?" A voice asked behind him. He turned, startled to focus on the voice. Just his luck - Finn stood there, looking at him with a constipated look. "Do I know you?" He strained to look at him, and Luke could see him trying to think but Luke also knew he wasn't getting anywhere. Though he looked like a Fabray, he didn't look enough like Quinn to be recognized by a person like Finn. In fact, he thinks Frannie was the only person who recognized him like she did because of how close they've always been.

He cleared his throat to gain time and tried to appear aloof, sticking his hands in his jeans' pockets. "No. I'm, um, new around town." He smiled politely and stepped forward, sticking his right hand out at Finn who took it, and they shook. "I'm Luke... Luke Fabray. I'm looking for my cousin, uh, Quinn. I heard she might be here."

Finn immediately lit up. "Of course! Well, I'm just getting here - so I'm not sure if she's here yet. I'm Finn, by the way. She must've told you about me. We used to date?" He spoke so fast it barely gave Luke enough time to follow what he was saying. He just nodded along, trying not to cringe at the memory of ever dating Finn Hudson, sack of potato in a human body. "Come on, I'll walk you in and introduce you to people and stuff." Luke tried not to notice, but he couldn't help and see the way Finn's smile faltered for a bit.

"Are you okay?" He asked before he could help himself. Sure, he couldn't really stand Finn anymore, but he still cared, you know - he was his (well, her) first boyfriend and close friend.

He nudged his sandal at the concrete and shrugged lightly before admitting, "just girl problems." He started walking into the house, and made sure Luke followed him in. He whispered, as if it was a secret, "this is my current girlfriend's house and I'm pretty sure she's going to break up with me today."

It shouldn't have lit him up the way it did, especially if Finn told him in such a sad manner, but Luke had to actively try to hide his smile by placing a hand on his lips. "What makes you say that?" He asked, when he managed to appear serious again.

Stopping right before the kitchen, Finn shook his head, "she's - well, we've been having problems. Besides, I've been a jerk lately."

Well, that's something he didn't have to tell Luke. He knows that all too well from observing their interactions in the hallways. Instead of saying what his instincts told him to, he managed to get out a, "sorry, dude," before he was being thrust into the bright kitchen by Finn's large hand on his back.

"Don't worry. Hey, Rach," He muttered at his girlfriend, but played off with a smile.

The petite brunette's head was in the refrigerator, only her ass sticking out, followed by endless tan legs in the shortest skirt Luke had ever seen. It was neon green and wrapped around her waist, revealing way too much skin. At the sound of Finn's voice, Rachel slammed the refrigerator door shut with a plastered smile and seemed genuinely surprised by the guest. Oh, and that white tank she was wearing was doing nothing to hide her red bikini, barely covering her breasts. Luke could see the outline of her shaped and toned abs. He licked his lips, absent-minded.

"Oh," she said, ignoring Finn's presence and being attracted toward Luke's. "Hi. I - well, hello." She blushed, and dared a glance at Finn, who seemed confused. "I'm Rachel Berry," she grabbed Luke's hand in hers and shook it vehemently. "And you are?"

"Luke," Luke told her. "Luke Fabray." He smiled at the last name, hoping it would cause a reaction on Rachel. And, cause a reaction it did.

Rachel 'ah'd and leaned in, "You're related to Quinn."

"Yes, yes, I am." He admitted. Then, he stuck with the same lie he told Finn earlier. "I'm her cousin. I'm here because I made a surprise visit to her at home, but Frannie said she might be here?"

Finn, at this point, had been completely forgotten. He huffed, drawing both of their attentions back to him. "Rachel, can we go talk?" He sounded petulant and whiny, and Luke literally winced at the tone of voice he used on Rachel. Crossing her arms, Rachel turned to him with her best glare and responded in kind.

"I have a guest, Finn. Don't be rude. Go hang out with the guys outside and we'll talk later."

He looked like a toddler who had been scolded. Suddenly, Luke wondered if Finn wasn't just that - an overgrown toddler. He smirked and held back a laugh.

Rachel gave him her attention again and apologized in behalf of her boyfriend. "I'm so sorry about that," she gestured in the direction the taller boy had gone and chuckled bitterly, "sometimes he acts like -"

"A toddler," Luke finished for her and then looked surprised at the way he finished her sentence. Afraid she might have taken it personally, Luke opened his mouth to take it back but she laughed. A good, hearty laugh.

"Yeah, something like that." The hand she touched on the inside of his elbow made sparks fly every which way on his body. He could feel the sensation run through his veins, straight to his brain, and then directly to his newly acquainted friend. The one between his new, hairy legs. "So, Luke - welcome to the party. I must tell you Quinn isn't here yet but you're more than welcome to attend."

Luke laughed along with the bubbly girl's laugh and then said, "I'm sorry for just crashing your party. But, well, I'd - actually love to make new friends here. I've spent enough time with Quinn in my lifetime." He joked, proud of his wit and - well, it didn't matter that he was the only one who actually got it.

Rachel nodded along and said, "you know, I was hoping she'd be here, but -" she sighed, getting distracted by a fleeting thought. Luke tried to watch for what she might be thinking about his other self in her eyes, but he was unsuccessful. "Anyway!" She clapped her hands together once and they both came crashing down to earth. "Would you like anything to drink? I have root beer, lemonade, tea, and I'm 100% sure that Puck, Santana, and Artie have a secret stash of alcohol in a cooler somewhere in the backyard."

"Water?" He asked, trying not to be much of a nuisance. Besides, he did not know yet if alcohol would have any side effects on his body. Rachel nodded and made her way back to the refrigerator. She pulled out a frosty plastic bottle and handed it over. He thought it might be kind of bothersome to bring it up, but decided to anyway because of the way Rachel seemed to have felt when Quinn's name came up. "So, Quinn? Why did you not expect her to come?" He hated it that Rachel still doubted his - her - intentions of being good friends, real friends... kind of friends. Rachel looked at him with concern - maybe, he thought, she didn't think she should trust him. He uncapped the bottle and tried to seem like it didn't matter much. "Go on, you can tell me."

"Well, I never really know where I stand with her. One day we're friends, the next day we aren't. Sometimes I think there-" there she stopped herself and smiled her fake smile. A smile Quinn, inside of Luke, could recognize very well. "Never mind. I guess I just wish she considered me as much a friend as I consider her, you know?"

Luke's heart melted at the confession and the way Rachel's voice seemed to be laced in honesty, in vulnerability - in hope. It was dripping in the hope of being Quinn's friend. So he told her what he knew was truth, "you're much more than just a friend to her." His voice was soft, raspier than what he had grown used to in the past hours he's been a dude. It reminded him too much of Quinn's voice when she was feeling weakened by Rachel. "Like, dude," he emphasized the word dude, to make it seem legitimate that he was a seventeen-year old teenage boy. "She's always telling me about you. She's generally a hard nut to crack, but once you get in there - she's - " he stopped, looked at Rachel who was listening and hanging on intently to every word he spoke, like it mattered to her. He breathed in and finished, "I think she considers you her best friend."

He could hear Rachel's breath catch in surprise. Then he saw her long lashes flutter at the new information and she blushed profusely. Luke didn't know what brought that on, but he smiled small at the reaction. "She told you this?" Rachel felt the need to ask. She stopped right before the door that lead to the backyard and gave her undivided attention to Luke - her new confidant. "I thought Santana, or like, Brit - maybe; even Mercedes, I thought they'd be her best friends."

The way Rachel was expecting an answer made Luke want to just come out and tell her that they are Quinn's friends, but they don't compare to her. That Rachel was the only constant in Quinn's roller-coaster of a life. That even if sometimes Rachel was upset at her, or when she was upset with Rachel, the girl never faltered; never disappointed. She was present, she was real, she was true. She, Rachel, was the only one who had shown she cared about Quinn through her lows and her highs. "No, Rachel, it's you." Of course, he stayed silent about her also being Quinn's soul mate. Maybe that was too much information for a first meeting.


	3. Chapter 3

If I Were A Boy, Part III

Hour: 8.5

It turned out that Quinn was getting used to the idea of being Luke. It's exactly what she wanted. This way he could practically tell Rachel anything and not have to worry about how she'd react or how others would perceive him. He glanced at the girl walking in front of her, toward a table set up with snacks and drinks, and totally checked her out. It was freeing to be able to rake her eyes down that gorgeous body.

"I'll introduce you to the other kids soon," she told him with a soft voice when he stopped to stand near her.

He had yet to officially "meet" the other kids. He saw Sam talking to Britt at the end of the pool, and Santana watching from afar with an intimidating stare. She was territorial. It made Luke smirk; in that aspect, him and Santana were quite alike. The girl caught his stare from across the yard and leaned forward on her chaise. She tilted her head and pursed her lips, trying to figure out if she knew the dude. Luke raised his hand and acknowledged that he could see her. Immediately she turned away and pretended she hadn't seen him.

He laughed quietly and went back to staring at Rachel because just look at her being beautiful. Her obsessive compulsive disorder was making itself known as she fixed the bowls of chips for the fourth time. Maybe she was nervous, but maybe she was just that OCD. Rachel turned at the sound of his quiet chuckling and blushed profusely. "I'm sorry," she apologized with a small smile. She fidgeted with her fingers as she admitted, "I happen to be a bit OCD."

Luke always enjoyed hearing Rachel offer information to him that she thought he didn't know. Because Luke wasn't supposed to know these things; he just so happened to be the one person in all of McKinley who paid the most attention to Rachel. "I can see that," he admitted. And then, out of nowhere, he heard his mouth betray his most inner thoughts, "it's cute." Shit. Shit.

Rachel's eyes snapped to him, and he gulped, already thinking of ways to apologize. For a good, long second, he forgot all about being Luke and freaked that now she knew. But slowly cognition came back to him and he started to calm himself down. Still, he didn't want to immediately come off as a creeper. That would ruin all his chances at this so needed second chance. She smiled shyly after a few seconds, and he breathed a sigh of relief when she murmured a "thanks." He noticed her cheeks blush a faint pink, barely there, but incredibly endearing and he felt warm.

The football hitting the back of his head is what broke their moment. He grimaced and held back a curse word or two and lifted a hand to the spot that hurt. "Ouch," he eventually said and looked behind to see where the ball had come. Finn was staring right at the two with a somber expression and he didn't look like he felt guilty about it at all.

He said, "sorry," from across the pool, with a 'get away from my girl' look and Luke didn't know what to do.

Rachel looked furious. She turned her heels in the direction of Finn and shot him a very disappointed and pissed off Rachel Berry glare. At that second - as if Rachel were fuel to his wood (literally) - he caught fire from within and felt himself start to tingle. Well, it would have been awkward if he got a boner here. That would also probably ruin his chances with Rachel. He tried to think of something to cool himself down but it wasn't working. Rachel looking angry reminded him of those sexually charged discussions Quinn had with Rachel - so, basically, all of them. And those always worked wonders for Quinn once she was home. Sadly, right now was not the time. He tried to focus on something incredibly disturbing like... Sue and Schue gettin' it on. Yeah, that was working.

Meanwhile, Rachel was berating Finn in front of all their friends about being rude to a guest - "Quinn Fabray's cousin," she had reminded him - and was asking him to come over to apologize. Luke watched Santana smirk from her seat at the boy being - well, humiliated - like that. Luke didn't really know what had gotten into Rachel ever since that previous day when Quinn had run into her in the bathroom, but he definitely liked it. He definitely enjoyed watching Rachel grow some (hopefully very hypothetical) balls. It's like that Rachel from the beginning of Sophomore year, back then when she had so much passion it just overwhelmed all of McKinley, was back. And damn that was hot.

Finn wobbled over, trying not to look as fucking pathetic as he did and extended his hand in an invitation for a hand shake. "Sorry, man."

"No problem," Luke told him with a suspicious look. Luke knew he should be wary of Finn because the guy was kind of a pain in the ass when he felt threatened. Hopefully he wouldn't cause too big of a problem.

Hour: 9.5

The party was in full swing. Luke had been properly introduced to everyone and currently found himself in a conversation with Mike and Sam about superheroes. That was a secret obsession of Quinn's that she was adamant nobody at McKinley found out. Not even Santana. Especially not Santana. Being Luke right now had its perks. He attentively listened to Sam's argument as to why The Hulk was the best.

That was a lie. He wasn't as attentive as he tried to make himself look. For the past half an hour or so, Luke had been looking for Rachel. And Finn. Rachel and Finn had disappeared a while back and as much as he made an effort to not care, he couldn't. It was his job to make sure that this time around Rachel got what she deserved. And Luke wanted to protect Rachel. He wanted to protect her from so much: slushies, mean names, stupid boyfriends... heartbreak.

No matter how many times Luke denied to himself, what Rachel felt for Finn was love. Or at least, she thought it was. Maybe Rachel couldn't tell because she was young, but who was Luke to tell Rachel who she did or didn't love? Luke was nobody.

The problem Quinn has always had with Rachel and Finn was that they tried to make something that didn't work, work. And, as much as Luke loved The Beatles, love wasn't all you needed.

Respect, trust, commitment, friendship - that's what's needed. Luke wanted to scream those words into Rachel until she understood. And if he was still Quinn right now, he probably wouldn't, but as Luke he felt like he maybe could.

To let Rachel know that there were better and bigger things out there. That there was someone who didn't know or understood till recently - but there was someone who would respect her, trust in her, commit to all of her - the good and the bad, -and would be her friend, no matter what. There was someone who wanted to be that someone for Rachel. And there was someone who would give her all the love that Rachel wanted.

Finally, he saw Rachel and Finn coming back out of the house. He was relieved to see Rachel hadn't been crying but as his eyes focused lower, his fists tightened in a bout of jealousy when he saw their hands clasped. Apparently they hadn't broken up. That was just awesome. He tried not to focus on the fact that they were talking inside the house, where certain things could have happened. Well, that just made him feel like throwing up.

Surprisingly enough, Rachel walked straight up to him, and smiled at Finn as he gave her a kiss on the cheek and wondered off to play ball with Puck and Santana. Mike and Sam noticing this excused themselves and went too, leaving Luke alone with Rachel near the grill - where vegetables were sizzling alongside some hot dogs and burgers, - and Artie playing his guitar with Mercedes and Tina.

"Hey," she smiled and moved some bangs out of her eyes. Luke especially loved the way Rachel's hair looked when she curled it. It was really attractive, and the bangs kept getting in her eyes, making her blow air out of her mouth upward. It would flutter the short strands of hair above her forehead but they wouldn't really move away. The pouty lips and the clear annoyance came off really funny and adorable to Luke. "Is Quinn coming around?" Rachel asked. It made Luke smile to know that she was asking about him, even though she didn't quite know that.

He smiled apologetically and lied, "No. She just replied to my text saying she couldn't make it."

"That's really too bad," Rachel practically murmured and worried her bottom lip between her teeth. "Are you guys close?" She asked.

Luke nodded with a chuckle, "um, yeah. Pretty close." Rachel didn't need to know just how close - like, same body close.

The next question is what made Luke realize that Rachel was fishing. "Does she ever talk about her friends from McKinley? From Glee club? About, say, me?" When she looked up into his eyes, Luke could see how much Rachel needed to hear it.

"I told you - she considers you her best friend," he reminded her. It was too bad Rachel hadn't realized it yet that they'd be perfect together.

"I know," Rachel said and seemed a little disappointed. She mumbled, "that's not how I meant it, but -" she trailed off, looking to the side and getting distracted by the boys horse-playing way too close to the snacks table she spent so much time on. "Hey!" She yelled at them and wandered off in that direction.

She left Luke replaying that last, unfinished sentence over and over and over in his head.

How did she mean it?

Hour: 10

When Santana started to approach Luke by herself, he tried to come up with a million excuses. He didn't even know why - just knew he should be prepared.

"Have we met before?" Santana asked as she settled in front him, her feet shoulder-width apart. She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at him. "Because I'm one of Quinn's closest friends..." -wrong; maybe one of her longest friends but not closest. "And I feel like I'd have met you."

Luke shrugged and took a longer sip of his lemonade, "no," he mumbled from behind his cup. "I don't think we've ever met."

"Really?" Santana insisted, coming closer to try and look him in the eyes. It was later in the day so the sun was slowly making its way down to the horizon. The angle they were standing at worked in his favor. "Because I should know you." She repeated. "I'm kinda offended Quinn never introduced us. And that's too bad." Now she moved to pradatory territory, trying to flirt her way to information.

"Really," Luke told her and walked away, slight irritation on his walk. He could feel Santana still watching him, like she had been all day long.

Hour: 10, a few moments later

"Hey," Sam approached with a hard slap in the middle of his back. "All dudes play, shirts versus skins. You're a skin," he walked away, already taking off his shirt.

The last remaining people in the pool got out - Kurt and Mercedes - to watch the basketball game. One single hoop was mounted above Rachel's dads' garage door - because Leroy used to play basketball in college.

Hesitant, Luke considered not playing but he didn't want to come off as a dick. Still he pointed out, "I'm in jeans and wearing a vest. I'm not wearing appropriate basketball attire." All the guys looked at him with confused looks. He didn't know if guys played basketball like this. Did they? Besides, not his clothes and he didn't want to ruin those.

"It's okay, Luke. It's my fault. I should've offered you a change of clothes when you got here since this is a pool party. My daddy Hiram is just about as tall as you." Rachel was already spinning on her heels and walking away when his brain caught up.

This was just perfect. Luke sucked at basketball. He was going to be the laughingstock amongst the guys - Rachel's friends, - and she'd think he was a loser. How pathetic could he get?

Then there's that other thing. That tattoo that was so painfully obvious for Rachel he - he sighed and just agreed, "okay. Let me just go-" he pointed toward the inside of the house and started to make his way after the brunette.

"Rachel?" He asked as he stood there, in the middle of Rachel's living room. He hadn't been here often, but the times he had, he always noticed just how proud of their little family the Berrys were. He loved them more for it. When Quinn came over during the school year with other glee members for impromptu rehearsals, they never treated her badly. And it's not like they didn't know about her history with Rachel - they knew. They were just genuinely caring people. Like Rachel.

Just as he was about to go upstairs toward Rachel's room, the brunette appeared from a hallway to her left with shorts and a light cotton shirt. She handed it to him and pointed to the bathroom, "bathroom's right there. Go ahead and change and I'll let them know you're coming soon."

He made his way to the bathroom, clutching the clothes in his fist so hard it was hurting. Why was this so nervewrecking?! It's just a game of basketball! He could do this - he was Quinn Fabray, fucking head cheerleader and head bitch in charge, even after giving birth to a daughter while in high school. He expelled shaky air through his nose slowly and washed his face with cold water. Snapping out of it, he shed his clothes and put on the borrowed swimming shorts and a gray tank.

So what if he had to take his shirt off? Rachel would never know that tattoo was for her now. Not if it was inked on Luke's body.

Luckily, Quinn had been able to hide the tattoo from the other kids at school. She hadn't made the same mistake as when that awful Ryan Seacrest tattoo sat on her back and paraded it around. Especially because if she had, the entire school would have figured it out who she, Quinn Fabray, HBIC, belonged to.

Luke stared into strange emerald green eyes and put on a fake smile on his face. He'd be fine. Nobody would notice.

Hour: 10, a few moments later

"Way to take for fucking ever, new kid," Puck said as he approached the guys. Artie held the basketball on his lap. The skins were already shirtless, he noticed with apprehension.

"Noah," Rachel chastised from the sidelines.

He groaned and apologized softly.

"You could've started without me," Luke said, emanating confidence he really didn't have. Quinn had always been a great pretender.

"We wanted to," Sam admitted.

"But Rachel wouldn't let us," Finn completed.

"She said it's be rude even though we explained dudes don't care," Sam said.

"It's still rude!"

"Chill, hobbit," Santana said from her spot in the grass, leaning back into Britt.

Kurt was the only guy not playing. He didn't want to ruin his new swimming outfit that he had spent time working on. Tina was next to Kurt, on a towel. Mercedes sat on a plastic chair. Rachel stood, looking mildly annoyed Santana called her a hobbit.

Sugar, who apparently was the designed ref ordered Luke, "take off your shirt." The smile with which she said that was uneasy for him. Immediately he sought Rachel's eyes and she smiled reassuringly. He gulped and pulled the tank off and handed it to Rachel.

And that's all it took. It wasn't in the middle of the game that Rachel noticed it; her eyes found it as soon as the shirt was off, attracted to it like bee to honey. She seemed like she wanted to say something, her mouth opened and closed a few times, but then she just ended up saying, "good luck." It came out in this breathless voice, trembling almost, her eyes never leaving his side.

He thought he saw Rachel want to reach for it but decided that was stupid. He made his way toward his team - Sam, Finn, and Artie - and found that Finn was staring at him with suspicious eyes again. Whoever had the idea of putting Finn in the skins team? He was not great to look at. Luke managed to control the urge to roll his eyes and smiled.

In front of them, the opposing team - Mike, Joe, Puck, and Blaine. Maybe, Luke thought, just maybe he could win this to impress Rachel. It was highly unlikely but they had Sam and he always made the basketball team. He had hope.

"Let's go! What are we waiting for?" He asked.

Hour: 11

Skins ended up losing, which wasn't a surprise. It wasn't as bad as he thought it'd be though. Especially because during the entire game he had his own personal cheerleader. Now Luke understood why guys were so into cheerleaders. It was kinda hot having someone cheer and scream and yell his name. It boosted his ego. He even scored a few baskets.

He could tell Finn was pissed Rachel's attention wasn't on him most of the time. And she was still supportive to all of the other guys equally when they had the ball, but she got a lot more involved when Luke played.

She handed him a cold water bottle as soon as he came closer at the end of the game. "Thanks," he told her, for the water. "And thank you for cheering for me."

Rachel said, "I'm sure had Quinn been here, she would have taken that job since she's such a great cheerleader and your cousin. But since she isn't... I decided it was my duty."

"Well, I appreciate it. And I'm sure she will too, when I tell her." He took the tank she was holding back and used it to dry his sweat off. Now that he had been under Rachel's gaze the entire time, he was less uncomfortable in his body. Even with the tattoo. He let her ogle him for a while before putting the shirt back on.

"What are you doing?" Rachel asked, seemingly upset. Her eyes demanded him to stop that right now and so he did. He stopped halfway and stood there looking like a goof - his hair sticking up in every direction and his elbows up in the air.

He slowly said, clearly confused by her outburst. "Putting my shirt on?" Without meaning to, his left eyebrow rose in the Fabray manner and Rachel focused on that particular movement. He let the shirt fall because it gave him something to do while she watched him.

Rachel, again, looked like she wanted to say something about it but he hoped she'd attribute it to a family thing and waited for her to speak. "Um," Rachel cleared her throat and shook her head in a clear effort to try to organize her thoughts. "I -" her eyes fell to the covered tattoo and he could sense how much she wanted to see it closer. Instead, she said, "We're all swimming now. No use in putting the shirt back on."

Of course, that's what it was. He loved the reaction his body caused on Rachel. Luke was thankful he always had been an athletic girl. Who knows? Maybe if he hadn't when he turned, he would've had a body like Finn's and that's just a no-no. "Right," he said, pursing his lips.

Rachel looked at the lips and had the decency to look ashamed when Luke caught her. He smirked to himself when she turned away hurriedly. She caught up with Kurt and Tina as they walked in the house to grab more cups. Luke's gaze stayed fixated on her. He was willing her to look; he hoped she would; he knew she would. Her skirt swayed in the late afternoon breeze, her gloriously endless tan legs swaying too.

His eyes made way up her body slowly. His entire being - soul, mind, heart - found home when he got to her eyes. She had been watching him check her out. And she looked pretty damn fine with it.


	4. Chapter 4

If I Were A Boy, Part IV

Hour: 11

Artie had been the first to leave when his dad showed up to pick him up at around 4 PM. He claimed that he had to work on some Physics homework and ended up giving Sam a ride home. After them, slowly the group was thinning out: Mercedes had choir practice at church at 6; Kurt and Blaine had plans with Kurt's dad; Tina and Mike were going out to a movie. The more people left, the more Luke felt like he was overstaying his invitation, so he texted his sister to come get him. He thought about begging on the text, but that would've been too low.

Unfortunately for him, his sister texted back asking if he could ask someone for a ride because she was stuck in Columbus for a few more hours. Who was he supposed to ask? Santana? She would rip him to pieces on the way to Quinn's house and end up finding out his secret, and Brittany had come with Santana. Sugar would attack him and try to make out with him, and that was definitely not in the plans. Finn was out of the question: he remembered the way Finn drives, and he was kind of afraid Finn would try to kill him on purpose or something. Then there was Puck, but Luke knew that Puck was actually going to see Beth after this party, and Quinn didn't want to deal with thinking about that.

That left asking Rachel. Which... if he was being really honest about it, he minded the least, but it also left too much room for Rachel to probe. On the other hand, it left him room to "get to know" Rachel.

This might have worked out in his favor.

He approached her when Finn went inside to use the bathroom. He only knew that piece of information because Finn felt the need to announce it to everyone. Gross. "Hey," he started.

Rachel turned away from the door Finn had disappeared through with a disgusted face but shook it away to smile at Luke. "Hey, back," she told him and gave him all her attention.

"So, um, I was wondering - well, my sis-" he caught himself before he finished the sentence and corrected it halfway, hoping Rachel didn't pay much attention to the mishap. "Quinn's sister - Frannie - gave me a ride here, and now she's stuck up in Columbus and I was wondering if you'd..."

Before he could finish asking, Rachel was already giving her response, "of course, Luke! I wouldn't mind it at all. Though, it'd be rude for me to leave my party until everyone else did, so do you mind staying a little longer or do you have to go?" Rachel was standing, ready to make excuses if that were the case.

"No! That's okay - I wouldn't mind staying at all." At least he knew Rachel didn't mind his company or him staying so long. It actually seemed like she was trying really hard to accomodate him in every way possible.

He still hadn't forgotten the way she looked at him earlier, and he kept trying to catch her eyes again ever since, but it hadn't happened... yet. They shared looks, sure, but none had been as - telling as that one. He needed to see it again to be sure that she might be into him.

"Good," Rachel asserted and moved to start picking up plastic cups on the grass around the pool, "I kinda like your company." She added and walked off to dispose of the trash.

Hour: 11.5

Finn hadn't been too thrilled with the idea of Luke staying after he left, but if Rachel noticed, she didn't seem to care. Luke just pretended he wasn't around, and Finn left with a sullen look. He was the last to leave, which meant that soon Rachel would be taking Luke home.

Interesting was the way that as soon as Finn left, Rachel turned to Luke with wide, bright eyes and asked, "would you mind helping me clean up?" She looked around the yard and it was a mess, even if Rachel had tried to not let it get this bad. He would have never said no, and he probably would have even offered, but the fact she asked him let him know that maybe Rachel wanted him to hang around longer; she wanted to spend time with him and she wanted it to be alone time.

Mindlessly, he nodded and followed her toward the kitchen where she grabbed two large, white plastic bags. "So," they walked back out through the door that connected the kitchen to the pool area, "just pick up the trash?" It was a stupid question - what else would he need a trash bag for? - but he felt comfort in knowing Rachel would take that line and run with it for a while on her own. By giving her a question, he was sure to get an answer. And he was sure that this answer would keep them in safe conversation territory.

"Yeah," she pointed at the various items laying around - cups, napkins, cans, bottle, paper plates, balloons, streamers - and then flashed him a warm smile. "Those kids can get pretty bad. Actually, if I didn't have to take you home, I'd probably be sorting the trash into recycle and such but I know you want to go home." He barely had time to make a comment on not actually wanting to go home before she kept going, "Did you know that Americans use 2.5 million plastic bottles every hour?" She huffed at the fact and crushed the empty water bottle in her hand. "Every hour, Luke," she shook her head. "And assuming most people don't recycle -" she stopped abruptly and that made Luke actually stop his job to look at her in question.

"What's wrong?"

"The tattoo," she said breathless. It was like out of nowhere, the tattoo had slammed into her mind and stopped her in her tracks. She bore deep brown eyes into his emerald green ones and elaborated. "Your tattoo. Can I see it again?" She dropped the trash bag on the ground and cleared her throat. He thought she looked like she wasn't done talking, because she kept biting her lip, and he wanted to know what was going on in that head, but he let her take her time. Eventually, she said, "it was beautiful, but I only caught a glimpse of it and I was hoping..."

He shifted his weight and scratched his neck, "Rachel, it's just a tattoo -"

His attempt at making her forget it was unsuccessful. She got closer and pried the bag away from his hands, those doe-like eyes almost pleading him, looking up from below and there was no way he was saying no here. She knew it too, apparently, because when he sighed, she smiled slightly. He was sure that she already figured out the kind of power she had on him. "It's never just a tattoo. There's always a meaning. I won't make you do it if you don't want to, but it'd mean a lot..."

She knew she had won when his bag hit the ground. "Before anything, I just - well, it's complicated, okay?" He felt like he had to explain it before she even saw it, so she wouldn't jump into conclusions that couldn't possibly be about her (since he didn't even "know" her). Forget that he did know her. Somehow, in his mind, the moment she saw the tattoo, she'd know, but there was no plausible way.

He felt vulnerable, and he saw that Rachel understood, because the smile faded and her eyes got all serious and determined. "I promise I won't make you uncomfortable."

With that, he lifted his shirt all the way off. There was no point in doing this half-assed. If she was seeing the damn tattoo, she sure as hell was going to appreciate his abs.

On his left ribcage, immediately under his heart, a star - a five-point star. Small, not extremely large, but big enough to fit the words of a haiku, in beautiful script:

"If the stars waited  
lifetimes just to shine for you  
then so too can I."

The tattoo was like a magnet to Rachel. Luke couldn't help but wonder if Rachel would have thought it was for her if he was Quinn right now. "Luke," Rachel spoke softly, almost afraid that if she used her normal tone of voice that the tattoo would disappear. He could tell she wanted to touch it. Her hand lingered, hovered, above the ink. "I -"

"Go on," Luke urged her, "you can touch it."

Their eyes connected, and this time it had been like Luke had searched for all evening. It was intense and there was no resistance or hesitance on either part. Rachel didn't break eye contact until she touched the tattoo with her fingertips, tracing the star and the words - reading the words over and over, he could tell. Her eyeballs shifted from side to side rapidly, wanting to absorb every word and the meaning they conveyed.

"I'm hardly speechless, Luke," she told him. "But I - I'm in awe." Somehow her palm was covering the star and she looked up at him, who was feeling a little warm at their proximity. He felt goosebumps awaken over his skin. He was getting the impression that Rachel might want to kiss him, but he wouldn't make the move if she didn't first. Rachel stood on her tippy-toes, still not tall enough to match heights, and whispered, "whomever this is for? She's a lucky girl." With that, Rachel put some distance between their bodies and made a beeline for the trash bag she had forgotten about earlier.

Hour: 12

"So, um, thank you, for letting me crash the party," Luke spoke first. He had changed back into his clothes before leaving. Rachel took the time to change as well. She was wearing a pretty red summer dress with a ribbon tied around her waist, and a bow on her head. She looked adorable and innocent and completely different than the Rachel he had seen when he first arrived at her house.

Tense was not fit enough to describe how the car ride had been. They finished cleaning up soon after the tattoo incident, but Rachel spent about fifteen minutes looking for her car keys, because apparently they weren't were they were "supposed to be!" She had said that with an indignant look and a stomp of her foot. She found them in the refrigerator and attributed it to a prank by Santana.

As the car idled in front of Quinn Fabray's house, Rachel smiled, albeit a little forced. "You're welcome, Luke. I'm glad you did. It was nice getting to meet you and hanging out with you." By this point, Luke could already tell when Rachel was acting or being real, and this - he recognized from years of experience - was the real deal. In silence, he reached for the door handle. "Luke!" She called out to him before he could actually get out. He stopped and turned again to face her.

"Yeah?"

"Tomorrow, are you - are you doing anything tomorrow morning?"

"No plans."

"Want to come volunteering with me?"

"Okay."

"Pick you up at 8."

Luke almost made it out of the car before she stopped him again. "Luke!" When he turned, her eyes had been forced shut as if she was disappointed in herself for calling his name.

"Rachel," he said with an amused smile, interested in where this moment would lead to.

She turned off the car and said, "Are you busy right now? I know your cousins are both out - and, I'd hate to know that you came to Lima and didn't have an amazing time."

He grinned, and instead of giving her a direct answer, he asked, "what are we doing?" He settled back on his seat and buckled in.

Hour:13.5

"And for my latest birthday, my parents took me to Broadway to watch Wicked for the sixth time -" Rachel was talking as they walked around the mall. Luke was only half-listening. For most part he was nodding to encourage her to go on, but he couldn't help it that he found her too adorable to function. She kept on telling the story. "So I went and got a signed posted by - get this- Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth, who play Elphaba, the green witch, and Glinda, the perky, bubbly witch, respectively."

Quinn hadn't been to Rachel's that many times (she could count on her right hand the times she had been there, including today), but the one time that all the glee girls slept over, she noticed the Wizard of Oz poster Rachel had immediately to the right of her bed. Without realizing the issue, Luke asked, "did you put it up next to your Wizard of Oz one?" He wiggled his eyebrows and only realized what that implied when Rachel's brows twisted down.

"How do you know I have a Wizard of Oz poster in my room?" Shit! He hadn't been in her room at all today. This is not good.

Think, Luke. Think! Ah! "Well," he ran a hand through his hair, "I took a wild guess, knowing what I know so far about you. And I see I was right."

Rachel's suspicion was out of the way with that well-played lie. She kept talking as if she's never doubted at all, "yes," she admitted with a blush creeping up her neck and face, "I put it next to my Wizard of Oz poster. They're probably my favorite things in my room."

Luke smiled and asked, "why are they so special?" He saw an ice cream store that he liked to go to with his sister and steered that way. "Can I buy you an ice cream?"

She stopped talking and looked at him with round eyes, "um - I'm uh, vegan but-"

"I'm pretty sure they have, like, one vegan option, if you wouldn't mind that," Luke offered with a hopeful expression. He waited for her to nod and went ahead to order. He bought two of the same flavor. "Here," he handed hers over and started to enjoy his.

She looked flush, "you didn't have to get the vegan one, Luke." He had never seen Rachel so embarrassed before - but not in a bad way. The way she looked informed him that she liked that he did even if her words said otherwise. "But thank you for the ice cream."

"No problem. And I don't mind trying new things. This vegan one isn't half bad. But," he pointed to a table and she nodded, "you were telling me something..."

"Right!" Oh, man. Rachel Berry with an ice cream cone was something to die for. That little tongue kept sneaking out to lick the white treat and Luke's body was starting to react accordingly. He didn't expect that buying an ice cream for Rachel would make his ears buzz or his hands to start sweating; he didn't know that it'd make his stomach flip and he certainly wasn't expecting the pressure building between his legs. "The Wizard was the first musical I ever watched, ever. So I've always loved it..." He wondered if every guy reacted this fast to everything as well or if it was something his new body hadn't adapted to yet. "...And Wicked was my very first Broadway show! And I love everything about it - from music to plot and how it perfectly intertwines with Wizard of Oz." He focused on Rachel's voice and the story instead - and not her red, plump lips - and tried to compose himself. He was absolutely sure that at some point there his eyes glazed over. "And oh, yeah! Obviously because Idina Menzel reminds me... Well, she reminds me a lot of my own mother!" Rachel blurted.

Luke thought about Shelby, with Quinn's precious daughter, and chuckled quietly - more to himself. Rachel was right, now that he thought about it: Shelby was a replica of Idina! He grinned, wondering how nobody else in glee ever noticed that. "Really?"

"Yes! But," Rachel leaned forward on the table and whispered, "tell me more about yourself!" With her normal pitch she continued, "I feel like I talk too much and it's only about me." As she leaned to sit back on the chair, she drew a lock of hair behind her ear and Luke smiled. She was so adorable.

"What would you like to know?" He asked, even though he had a pretty good idea. Curious as Rachel always was, she would probably like to know everything. And she would probably want to start with the tattoo, if he was willing to share. Asking what she wanted to hear gave him time though, so he could organize his answers in his head.

Her eyes fell to the place where the tattoo was hidden beneath layers of clothes and gave him a secret smile. It was like she asked him the question without having to say anything.

"You have to ask," he asserted. Suddenly, that tension from before by the pool, and earlier in the car rushed back and hung over their heads. Luke started to think of this tension as sexual tension and he kind of liked it. It meant Rachel was digging him just as much as he wanted her to.

She gulped visibly and his tone and the way his eyes wouldn't leave hers. Dammit, if stupid Finn wasn't still in the picture, Luke would be kissing her right now. "I just -" she began, stumbling on her words and a catch in her throat. She licked her lips and finished, "wanted to know if it's for anyone in particular. And, like, what it means."

Luke inhaled a deep, deep breath and exhaled it slowly. "I guess it is for someone in particular. She has no idea it's for her. I got it one night when I was drunk. Except I had already thought about it forever. I had it sketched and in my pocket. Anyway, the next morning, I -" He almost said cried but that would probably make her think he was gay, so instead he cleared his throat. "I - " He ran a hand over his brows, worried.

"Luke, it's okay. You don't have to talk about it," Rachel told him though she did nothing to hide her disappointment. "Not right now. Maybe another day?" She suggested with a hopeful expression.

"Sounds good to me," Luke lied.

That was something Luke hadn't thought through. How was he to ever tell Rachel that he was Quinn. How would he even begin to explain it? And when he did so, how the hell was the tattoo supposed to come up? This was all about being better for Rachel and here he was, still lying. Still hiding. Still keeping his true self hidden. Rachel didn't deserve that. Rachel always deserved the truth and she needed to know the truth if she was to choose being with Luke other than Finn. It would be too unfair for Luke to have a Rachel who didn't know who he used to be.

He gave her a small smile, hoping to dear God that people really couldn't read minds otherwise he was screwed. The look on Rachel's face told him that she was oblivious to what was going on in his nook, so he relaxed.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" She asked and pointed behind him where the theatres were. "On me."

His smile grew, "only if you let me pay. And you pick."

She beamed at the suggestion, "you'd let me pick?"

He cast curious eyes at her and an eyebrow rose before he could stop it. For a fleeting second, he thought he saw recognition flash through Rachel's eyes, but he diverted quickly. "Why wouldn't I?"

Rachel's head lowered and she told him, "Finn always claims that I pick boring, girly movies so -"

"What is the deal with that guy?" Luke gritted through his teeth without thinking. Rachel looked alarmed at his angry tone. Luke continued, "I mean, is he always this big of an asshole?"

"He's... Not always that bad, Luke," Rachel defended Finn, and herself. "Lately we've just gone through a lot but..." She slowed down the pace they were walking and confided something. "Your cousin actually helped me with something extremely important. She's, well, um. Finn and I were supposed to get married and then we were going to go to New York. But Quinn told me to not do that; not waste my life on Finn Hudson. She was so persistent about it and I never wanted to listen..."

Luke was starting to get hopeful because he could almost taste the impending 'but' of Rachel's little speech. "But...?" He pushed her along.

"But then she sang this song in glee club this week and it just- god, I hope it clicked. Everything made sense to me. That's why I wanted her there this weekend. With all she's said to me, and what we've been through, and the looks and stares, and then that song and how she - the way she just-" Rachel stopped talking, afraid she said too much. "I'm sorry, Luke. Maybe I'm giving too much information. I'm not even sure of Quinn's side of all of this. I'm just saying what I hope and-"

All of this information was a lot for Luke and Quinn to reel in. He wanted to smile and kiss her right then but it would confuse the hell out of her. He also wanted to talk, and find out what she really felt, but now it felt like it was too late!

If Rachel really felt for Quinn what she was suggesting, then - Luke started to freak out. He really hoped this transformation wasn't permanent. And now he also had to worry about Rachel's reaction. Would she feel cheated that he got so close to her in this way?

He tried to maintain calm, "what about Finn, Rachel?" It almost sounded like a question Quinn would ask.

"I broke up with him today at the party," she admitted. Luke's entire world shifted.

"But - he seemed like everything was fine."

"He cried," Rachel told him conspiratorially. She shared a sad smile with him and added, "but I don't regret it. I explained to him that what we had was becoming toxic; that I wasn't liking who he was becoming. That it would be better if we ended things when we were still friends. Then I told him to enjoy the party." She chuckled at herself. "I don't know where I found the courage to do it, but, I feel much lighter now. We're waiting a while before telling our friends and so I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell Quinn."

Oops.

He nodded, "of course."

"And I'm sure Finn isn't over it. Later, when it all starts to hit him, he'll go through stages: denial, anger - he'll try to get me back, but it's settled, Luke. I'm done with it."

He couldn't help it but be proud, and he couldn't help it but tell her that. "I'm proud of you for doing that. You deserve better than that guy, Rachel." They started walking again, and Luke dared to walk just an inch closer, but not wanting to break the boundaries since she just broke it off with Finn.

"I'm sorry for telling you so much. I just, I feel like I can trust you..." She looked away, shyly and blushed.

Luke was confused if Rachel liked him, Luke, or if she liked Quinn. "You can. Always remember that. I know we just met, but you can always trust me."

"I do," she reiterated. They arrived at the ticket booth for the movies. She lifted her chin to be able to look at the titles and with a smile said, "Pitch Perfect?"

Quinn had been dying to watch that, so Luke didn't hesitate in pulling out the money, "whatever you want."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The haiku in the star is by Tyler Knott Gregson.


	5. Chapter 5

If I Were A Boy, Part V

Hour: 16

"Thanks for everything, Rachel," Luke told her once they were outside of Quinn's house for the second time that day. "I had fun." His eyes sparkled, and no, it's not like he could see it, but he could tell. He had an amazing time at Rachel's and then at the mall with her later. He still had a couple of things to figure out, but for the moment he was content in the way the day turned out. What began an awful day ended up great.

"No, thank you, Luke. I'm so glad I met you, really." She turned her face halfway toward him, only the light from a lamppost outside her car shone on her face. "I'll see you tomorrow, right? For the volunteering thing."

"Right," he reassured her. He was planning on being there.

For the third time that day, he reached for the door handle of Rachel's car with the intention of leaving, but again, she stopped him. "Luke." She sounded serious. He stopped and faced her again. "I - do you know if Quinn's home yet? I'd love to talk to her... or... something," she choked out. Now Luke was sure that whenever Rachel brought up Quinn's name, she'd blush profusely and awkwardly stutter. He'd never seen her like this before, but with what she told him that afternoon, he was starting to make sense of the entire scheme of things.

And they played out like this:

Rachel wanted Finn. So Quinn had wanted Finn, because Quinn, even though she had him at the time, wanted Rachel more. And the only way she could keep Finn from Rachel was if Quinn had him (it was the classic story of 'if I can't have you, then neither can him,' and she assured it'd work out that way.

Somewhere in the muddled story of Rachel's and Quinn's knowing-ship of each other, Quinn had realized this. At first it had been unknowingly that she wanted Rachel. But somewhere, somehow, with Rachel's insistence in being friends, Quinn came upon the realization that she wanted her; and that just maybe Rachel might want her too, she just didn't know it yet.

When Rachel told her Finn had asked her to marry him, Quinn saw her last door close; her last opportunity of making it up to Rachel, of repentance for every bad thing she did to her - vanish. So out of instinct she had told her not to marry him. It wasn't only for Rachel's sake - that was important too, her career - but she was a bit selfish.

And then, she got angrier, and angrier, and angrier. She tried in every which way to tell Rachel not to marry the guy. She remembered that damn conversation they had while trying on dresses for the wedding. In a pink bridesmaids dress she basically poured her heart out to Rachel but the brunette refused to understand.

She was thankful that she didn't give up. Sure, she stormed out that day. And she had announced it to Rachel she wasn't planning on going to the wedding, but that wasn't giving up. She was just trying to figure out a new way to approach the entire thing.

Singing If I Were A Boy hadn't been that new plan; it had just been a way to let frustration out. Frustration with herself, with Finn, and with Rachel. And apparently, that's what it worked. It's like the song spoke to Rachel that she deserved someone who would listen to her, who would do their best to not take her for granted.

And then, Rachel's world had changed. It took her half a day to figure it out. After her conversation in the bathroom with Quinn Friday afternoon, Rachel understood that Quinn had been taking care of her, in her own way. That Quinn knew how to be abrupt and honest, and when to lie and tell Rachel what she needed to hear.

So now Rachel wanted Quinn and knew she wanted Quinn, and she was nowhere to be found.

The entire time that Luke had been wanting to get through to Rachel, she wanted to see Quinn. Funny how life worked sometimes. Quinn thought she needed to be a guy to get close to Rachel. Rachel had been there all along, just... the timing hadn't been good for either. And now more than ever, Luke wanted to be Quinn! Luke needed to be Quinn, so he could have that real second chance with Rachel.

And he wasn't sure when he'd go back. He wasn't sure if he'd ever go back. The thought was frightening to him.

"No, she's not," he told her with a regretful smile. "I'll pass on the message to her?" He asked, hopeful that she'd be okay with that for now, and relaxed when she nodded in agreement.

"Good bye, then, Luke. Thank you for listening," Rachel said as he finally stepped out of the car.

He closed the door and peeked his head in through the window. He scratched his facial hair and itched the back of his neck. "It wasn't a problem. I'll see you tomorrow." With a charming smile, Luke stepped back and watched Rachel go.

Hour: 16.5

"I went to get us dinner. Pizza! Hungry?"

Before she mentioned it, he hadn't even thought about it, but as soon as she did his stomach growled and he realized he was starving. "Yes! Thank you!" He smiled and then remembered the predicament he found himself in with Rachel.

Frannie noticed this and raised an eyebrow, "how was your day?"

That was when Luke noticed the absence of his parents in the house. Everything was too quiet - mom wasn't in the kitchen making dinner as usual. That's probably why they were having pizza for dinner. "Where are mom and dad?" He asked and grabbed a slice of the warm Hawaiian pizza Frannie sat on the dining room table. He bit off a large portion and moaned at the taste.

Frannie shook her hair and commented, "I forget there's a girl under there..." Luke cast her angry eyes and she chuckled. "I told them to take a small trip to Columbus. I drove them there and even paid for the hotel for two nights. Maybe by then Quinn will be back?" She smiled hopeful, "if not, we'll figure out an excuse then."

"Thank you, I love you!" Luke threw himself at her, with the pizza still in his hand, careful not to slam his sister's face with the open pie. He spoke with his mouth full, "I don't know what I'd do if this had happened and you hadn't been here..." He shook his head, trying not to think of it.

"Probably cried all day, until the end of time." Frannie laughed out loud and Luke scoffed, but then let himself laugh along for a bit. "So, the day. The party. The girl. Tell me all about it."

And so Luke told her everything that happened, from getting to Rachel's, to being dropped off, to the volunteering thing the next day. He explained to her how this affected their situation now, and he told her he wasn't sure where to go from here.

"Well," she sighed and finished the last slice of pizza; Luke was on his fourth. "I guess you might want to tell her about your flipping, before she finds out elsewhere and is pissed with you for using it to your advantage."

"She's going to hate me."

"She won't," Frannie comforted him. "Especially not with that tattoo you have right there." She pointed to where the tattoo was located and then smiled. "Why didn't you tell me that's what it said? You just called freaking out - I thought it might have been an awful thing. It's actually rather poetic, Quinn."

"It's Luke, Fran. Call me Luke."

"No. Because that was all you - Quinn. And I just want you to know, I'm so proud of you. Love whomever you love, sis. I'll always be here."

The sentimentality of the moment made Luke get tears in his eyes, and so he hung his head. He dried them with the sleeve of his shirt and sniffled. When he looked back up at Frannie, she had the largest grin on her lips and pride overflowing her eyes. "I love you." He told her.

"I love you. Seriously, though. Figure out the thing with Rachel. Tell her and then go from there."

Hour: 18

Quinn spent the hour and a half since she had talked to her sister thinking about what to say to Rachel. How to say it, if she should say it. It was difficult coming up with anything other than, "I have a penis now, but I'm still Quinn." That probably wasn't the best way to segue into the conversation.

There was something else to consider. To "come out" to Rachel, meant she would have to come out. As in, tell Rachel that Quinn was gay. And as much as the Luke side of her didn't mind, seeing that Luke looked like a guy - was a guy,- the Quinn side was freaking out. What if Luke didn't stay forever? What if Rachel wanted Quinn to tell the entire world they were together, if they ever got together?

No, that was too much thinking for one brain, and it was too late for Quinn to be killing herself over it. She decided that what she really needed at the moment was to forget about the entire thing and work on a plan for the next day. Luke was going to that volunteer thing with Rachel in the morning and hopefully Quinn would have the guts by the end to tell Rachel who Luke really was.

The entire thing was confusing in Quinn's mind, but she had faith that she would figure it out.

Hour: 19

Luke woke up startled an hour later, only to find out that he had fallen asleep without a plan. It was midnight, which meant that he would have to be up in six hours if he intended to volunteer with Rachel. Volunteering was tiring, so he knew he needed to sleep as much as he could. He didn't want to be slacking the next day.

He figured that the next morning he would figure something out, and that for the time being, he really needed to get some sleep.

Hour: 25, 6 AM

The alarm woke him up, blaring in his room. He felt like anchors were holding his eyelids down and his entire body felt tired. The feeling was very much like the way Quinn would feel the morning after cheer practices; Luke hated the feeling.

He tried to conjure the alarm to stop from the right side of the bed, so he wouldn't have to move or open his eyes but that wasn't working. He kept his eyes closed and rolled and - he thought he felt lighter. It's not like he knew what it felt like to be a guy in the morning since he had only been a guy for one morning prior to this one.

He slapped the alarm with an open palm, brought his hand to his face and itched the smooth skin of his cheek. His very soft cheek.

He rubbed it this time, moving the hand toward his eyes to rub away the sleep when -

Wait. Luke did not have smooth, soft cheeks. In fact, his cheek and jaw were covered in fuzz, like a dude was supposed to have after puberty and stuff.

Quinn opened her eyes.

Oh, shit.

Hour: 25, about 10 seconds later

"Shit, shit, shit." Immediately Quinn was on her feet, running toward the mirror behind the door of her bedroom.

Staring back was the image of Quinn, traces of Luke completely gone. It was like it hadn't even happened and as if Quinn was always Quinn. Had it happened? Had Quinn really changed into Luke or had it all been a dream?

For the time being she couldn't make enough sense in her head to decide if it had all been a dream or reality. The thing that finally told her it had happened was the text message she got from Rachel that same minute.

Rachel B.: good morning, Quinn! I know it is early but I sincerely hope I haven't awoken you. I was just messaging you to ask if you're feeling well. I was hoping you'd make it to my party yesterday but figured that you still weren't feeling well from whatever it is you had on Friday. I knew something was wrong when we were talking in the bathroom but you didn't want to admit it. I hope that you will accept my sincerest wishes for your recovery and I'd also like to know if you needed anything. I'm more than happy to provide you with Vitamin Cs or cough drops and Kleenex since I'm on my way over to pick up Luke to go volunteering with me. I also hope you don't get upset at me for inviting him like that. if it's not a problem, could you, please, let him know I'll be there at 8 sharp? Thank you, Quinn Fabray.

So Rachel even wrote texts in paragraphs. It was kind of cute if Quinn ignored her first instinct to roll her eyes at Rachel's use of her last name. Then she remembered she had a bigger problem than how Rachel chose to type texts. She was back to her old self - a girl, not Luke. Rachel was expecting Quinn Fabray's cousin Luke and not Quinn herself.

If Quinn showed up to go volunteering, she would have to explain where she had gone and where Luke was now. That would be too big of a lie for Rachel to buy.

It seemed as if Quinn really only had one option left.

Hour: 27, 8 am sharp

Rachel rung the bell.

Frannie was trying to relax Quinn by telling her to breathe as she made her way to the door. "Relax, sis. Just - talk to her. She'll understand," she whispered as she backed away from a panicking Quinn. Her face was completely pale, and her breaths were shallow.

Before opening the door, Frannie inhaled deeply, expecting Quinn to do the same so Quinn did. She only opened the door once Quinn had gone back up the stairs.

"Hello, Frannie!" Rachel greeted her. "Or, I'm assuming you are Frannie. You look just like Quinn except taller." Rachel smiled, so polite. "You really are a beautiful family. I hope I'm not being a nuisance but I'm actually here for your cousin, Luk-"

Frannie stopped her right there. She had never actually met Rachel before, but she had heard so much about the girl from Quinn. Just like Quinn had told her, Rachel didn't seem like she planned to stop talking soon, so Frannie interrupted, "Rachel, hi. Thank you so much. Why don't you come in? Quinn needs to speak to you." Frannie directed her into the foyer of the large house and up the stairs.

"She does?" Rachel asked with a timid look. Frannie couldn't tell if she was excited or worried about that, but tried to suppress any fears by smiling.

Quinn could hear Rachel from the top of the stairs; she recognized Rachel's tone as one of concern and it made her doubt any chances she might have of Rachel understanding what happened. She thought about telling Frannie to send Rachel away, but it was too late. She raced into her own room and shut the door quietly. Rachel was coming up the stairs, being encouraged by Frannie. "She does. She's in her room. Just knock on the door to let her know you're here."

"What about Luke?" Rachel asked once they reached the top. She looked around, trying to find his friendly face, but Frannie re-directed her attention to Quinn's door.

"Right in there, Rachel. You need to hear this."

Quinn could almost see Rachel's worried face outside her door, her little fingers wringing each other. She was standing next to the door and she could hear Rachel breathing hard.

Then there were knocks and she froze on the spot. "Quinn?" Her voice was soft and shy, as if she was asking from downstairs and not just an inch away. "Quinn?" She whispered a little louder. "Your sister told me to come talk?"

Still frozen, Quinn tried to calm down her breaths but couldn't. She couldn't even speak, she was so nervous.

Rachel went silent. It's like she could tell Quinn was avoiding her and decided this wasn't worth the trouble. A few seconds later she spoke up again, "okay. I'm not going to force you into talking to me. I'll just... Go. Tell Luke I'll talk to him later."

She sounded disappointed, sad. Quinn's feet only moved when she heard the muffled steps of Rachel going down the stairs, walking further away from her. And when she thought about it, Rachel's literal steps were also figuratively taking her farther from Quinn. Quinn couldn't handle that thought. After what she went through with Luke and getting to know Rachel even better as him, she couldn't let this window of opportunity pass.

She ran downstairs, yelling for Rachel to stop. She opened the door of the house just in time to see Rachel get behind the wheel. Rachel looked up and they made eye contact, and it's like in that moment Rachel saw something - and Rachel understood.

Hour: 27.5

Thirty minutes later and they had yet to talk.

Quinn was sitting inside the car with Rachel. It was running, and the sound of the motor was the only noise. She had tried coming up with a way to start explaining herself but felt them all to be futile; in her head, they all seemed like bad sci-fi movies. She couldn't even explain how the transformation happened!

To her surprise, Rachel didn't do much. She sat there and waited with a patience Quinn had never imagined the girl to possess. It was admirable that Rachel was giving her the time but she kind of hoped Rachel pushed - maybe then she'd start talking.

"Did you say something?" Rachel asked, snapping her head towards Quinn and giving her those puppy eyes.

She didn't remember saying anything but Rachel seemed to really believe she spoke. "No?"

"Yes, you did." Rachel insisted. "You muttered something about pushing..." She took a deep breath and asked, "push what?"

Well, it is what she wanted, right? She centered herself, cleared her mind and decided to just come out with it. "Oh man," she dragged and laughed. "Rachel," she turned to face the brunette and found the most beautiful girl sitting right there. And then it hit her: Rachel was not only the most beautiful girl she's ever met - and was sure she would ever meet - but also the most beautiful person.

It came out before she could even help it, "I love you."

Hour: 27.5, the longest second later

"You do?" Rachel asked and sat up straighter. Her head tilted down to the right and Quinn's heart melted at how Rachel didn't start yelling at her to take it back. It's what she was expecting but not what she wanted. "You love me?"

In the question, Quinn found the strength to continue. "I do," she felt suddenly shy as she admitted, "I think I always have, I just didn't know how to deal with it." She paused, to give Rachel the chance to ask questions, but apparently Rachel was still exercising that alien patience she had. "So, um, I - ha, I didn't think I'd ever have a chance with you because of how I have treated you in the past. And then on Friday, after I sang that song in Glee club-"

"If I Were A Boy!" Rachel supplied, proud she remembered. "It was so good, Quinn. I didn't get to tell you that but I really loved it."

"Thank you, Rachel. But, well - this is the hard part." She didn't want to linger on the thought and instead just blurt it out, "I'm Luke. Or, Luke is me. I was afraid of being a girl in love with a girl and..."

Rachel inhaled deeply, surprised, but kept calm, cool, and collected otherwise. And still silent.

"I sang, right?" Quinn remembered her weekend, trying to find the best words to explain it. "And then when I saw you in the bathroom after I was already feeling kind of sick. I don't know who did what, just that the next morning I woke up as a boy."

Rachel's eyes widened comically and Quinn let herself smile at that. "That must've been... Weird?" She scrunched her face at Quinn, and then giggled. "And hairy."

Quinn laughed, but started to feel lighter as she was confessing about her alter-ego. It helped that Rachel was so incredible. "That was my second thought - all the hair."

"Really?" Rachel wondered. "What was your first?"

Quinn eyed her and admitted with a raised eyebrow, "the thing hanging between my new hairy legs?" She burst out laughing in a bout of embarrassment and when she managed to look at Rachel, she was laughing just as hard.

Rachel said, "you blush when you're embarrassed. It's very cute."

The compliment made Quinn stutter, unbelief taking over her mind. "T- tha -" she cleared her throat and tried to show some kind of control, "thanks."

It got quiet for a moment again, until Rachel brought up something Quinn had momentarily forgotten. "So -" she licked her bottom lip and looked at Quinn through her lashes - long lashes, "the tattoo." She stopped breathing. She was going to die, she was sure of it. Rachel giggled and moved closer to Quinn, "you're blushing harder," her brows crunched in a display of sympathy and she continued, "the tattoo, who's it for?"

Quinn thought Rachel evil because at this point Rachel knew, she just wanted to hear her say it. And say she did, just for her, "you. The tattoo is for you. It... It means that I could wait forever for you, because you are that worthy."

"Oh, Quinn," Rachel whispered out. Then in her normal tone of voice she said, "why didn't you tell me earlier?" She answered her own question when Quinn hung her head in shame. "You were afraid."

Quinn could only nod. No words could express how sorry she was.

"I have forgiven you for that. And I'll always forgive you, don't you know that already?"

Quinn's hazel eyes slowly rolled up Rachel's face - that cute chin, the smiling red lips, the nose she adored,- to her safe eyes. "I didn't think-"

"What?" Rachel reached for Quinn's hands and pulled them to her lap. She held tight, as if afraid this Quinn would run at any moment and leave her with a ghost. "That you aren't lovable? Oh, my god, Quinn. I -" She smiled again, hoping that Quinn would get it. "Quinn, when you were Luke, didn't you notice how much I asked about you?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"No buts. Quinn, you're an amazing young woman. Whoever you love is the luckiest person alive."

"Rachel," Quinn finally held Rachel's hands back. "I feel like I cheated you by lying to you as Luke. That was me trying to get to know you without suffering the consequences."

"I don't care about that, Quinn." Rachel told her honestly. "I'm glad you had a way to figure out how you really felt without worries." Rachel laughed at herself, "Now that explains why I liked Luke so much. He reminded me so much of you in a thousand ways. It was like having you without all the barriers you put up."

"I was trying something new..." Quinn joked quietly and allowed herself to look at Rachel. She had let one hand free to push some hair behind a ear but brought it right back.

When she caught Quinn looking she smiled, "I like it when you do that."

"Do what?"

"Stare," Rachel said with a breathless quality to her voice. "It's like you can't help it and it makes me feel desirable."

Quinn could never say Rachel wasn't always honest. She felt pressure start building up within her and she was absolutely sure that if she were still a boy, she would be getting hard by now. "I can't help it," she admitted. Rachel's eyes lingered on her lips as she spoke, and man did she recognize that. She scooted closer to Rachel, folding one leg under another, "and you are desirable."

"Quinn," Rachel almost urged. "Kiss me." She demanded. There was a need in her brown orbs and Quinn couldn't even think when she nodded. She was already halfway there when Rachel said that.

As soon as fiery lips touched, Rachel's hands left Quinn's and found her hair. There was a push and pull of soft lips, a little tease of tongue by Rachel enough to drive Quinn wild and make her groan softly. Rachel started giggling, and pulled away from the kiss, keeping her forehead connected to Quinn's.

Quinn just could not open her eyes, still caught up in the life-changing kiss.

"I think I have always loved you, too," Rachel said, wisps of warm air falling on Quinn's lips. "And I never thought you could love me too." She sniffled and it made Quinn open her eyes, worried for making Rachel cry. "So I lied to myself and to a lot of people around me, but truth is - I have always been yours."

"I'm ready now," Quinn decided. "Whenever you're ready - I know you just broke up with Finn but - I'll be here, as a girl, waiting for you."

Rachel squealed of happiness before throwing herself across the console into Quinn's arms for a hug and another kiss.

Three months and a day later

"Hey," Rachel smiled from beside Quinn, leaning on the locker next to hers.

"Hey, yourself," Quinn said back with suspicion. "You look like you've been planning something." She narrowed her eyes at Rachel and asked, "what is it?"

"How could you accuse me of such things!?" Rachel laughed as Quinn came closer. Quinn only came closer and closer, distracting Rachel, and then took Rachel's binders to carry them. "Thank you, Quinn." Rachel blushed, dropped her head, and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.

Quinn hummed happily and said, "so... the plotting."

"It's nothing big. I - well, it's been three months since that Sunday morning you kissed me in the car... And well, I might have prepared something for you."

"A song?" Quinn asked and rolled her eyes playfully. "Oh, no!" She threw a hand on her forehead, dramatically. "Embarrassing!"

Rachel pouted and was going to start complaining, "Quinn-"

"I'm kidding, love." That stopped Rachel on her tracks. "I love hearing you sing and if you're singing for me, I love it even more."

"You -" Rachel swallowed all her emotions and then smiled, "so Glee?"

"See you later," Quinn told her and handed her binders back as Rachel backed away into her Pre-Calc class.

Rachel was already sitting on a black stool in the middle of the room when Quinn came in talking to Santana. Santana had literally gagged when Quinn had told her she was Luke. Santana could not fathom being attracted to Quinn. They laughed about it after though.

Funny enough, nobody had came forward yet as being the person who helped Quinn with Rachel. The entire Glee club knew something happened between the two that weekend before summer but it seemed as they were waiting for it to be official. Sure, the girls knew of each others feelings and they had been hanging out all of the break, with other Glee clubbers and alone, but Quinn was waiting for Rachel to be okay with being over with Finn.

Finn had taken it the hardest but with time he learned to love his friends being into each other, even if they were girls. Eventually, he became their biggest supporter.

And when Rachel had told her that morning she had a song for her, she knew Rachel was ready.

Rachel even summoned the help of some of the orchestra to help Brad and the guys from the band with this song.

Her eyes didn't leave Quinn's from the moment she sat in front of her. Santana to her left, an open seat for Rachel, and Finn to that right. Behind Quinn, Tina, and next to Tina, Kurt and Blaine. Britt hurried in with Sam and sat next to Santana, pulling her into her arms. Sam winked at Rachel.

With everyone in the room she could begin, and with her every heart and soul, she sang for Quinn.

I've waited a hundred years.

but I'd wait a million more for you.  
nothing prepared me for  
what the privilege of being yours would do.

If I had only felt the warmth within your touch  
If I had only seen how you smile when you blush  
Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough  
Well I would have known  
What I was living for all along  
What I've been living for

Your love is my turning page  
Where only the sweetest words remain  
Every kiss is a cursive line  
Every touch is a redefining phrase

I surrender who I've been for who you are  
For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart  
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours  
Well I would have known  
What I've been living for all along  
What I've been living for

Though we're tethered, to the story we must tell  
When I saw you, well I knew we'd tell it well  
With the whisper, we will tame the vicious scenes  
Like a feather, bringing kingdoms to their knees

When the song was over, and Rachel had sat next to Quinn after their hug and all the applause, Quinn felt someone lean forward from behind. "You're welcome."

"Thanks, Tina," Rachel said over Quinn's shoulders. "Owe you one."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is where this fic ends. I have no idea how Tina did what she did, lol, but she's the best character left in this season of Glee so I'm in love with her.
> 
> hope you guys liked this story as much as I loved writing it.
> 
> thanks to the wife, AlsoAngels, for the song. It's called Turning Page by Sleeping At Last.


End file.
